My little cousin was telling me about his first drunken escapade. They decided to get hammered during their lunch hour (mistake #1) on stolen liquor from their parents (good move, they topped it off with water), but they mixed all the different kinds together (mistake #2). It almost went off without a hitch but one of the kids couldn't hold his booze well. They went back to school (mistake #3) and he acted all crazy and then puked in his locker (mistake #4). They were all were suspended 3 days.



The whole time I was confused as who I should be. The cool cousin, who tells him where he went wrong or the responsible cousin, who tells him he's too young to drink. After laughing at him for a long time, I decided to give him some sage advice:



Liquor then beer, you're in the clear.

Beer then liquor, you've never been sicker.